Number 1

Grrreatings and salivations, my adoring fans! It is I, the feared, revered, and so wonderfully handsome Pirate, Don Karnage! And it is your pleasure for my marvelous self to introduce you to the first ever Fanklub Newsletter! Now, we get a few things straight, yes-no?

First, if you wish to send your insignificant thoughts back us, then you may contact the Iron Vulture. If we are not so busy counting our plunder, then perhaps we might get back to you... maybe.

Second, for the future, it may serve you well to pillage the Calligrapher font for your computing-type thingies.

Kit: Yeah, but make sure you download it on your own computer.

Shoo, boy, this is my time. And third, if by chance your ignoram-oos of an email service cannot see this... very attractive letter, then we have provide a place where you may do so, at the official Fanklub Homepage. You will all, of course, keep this location in a quiet place, like inside your brain, unless you wish to be tied to the back of an elephant with a severe case of... never mind. But you will regret it! *ahem* Solicitations.



Q: First question for Kit. How in the world do you store that airfoil in your sweater?

Kit: Simple. There's a pocket in the back.

Karnage: Hmph. I have seen him pull everything from nail-clippers to chocolate-chip cookies from that thing.

Kit: *shrugs*


Q: For Karnage, what's your favorite type of plunder?

Karnage: Easy. All plunder!

Kit: He's lying. It's Frosty Pep.

Karnage: *frowns* Shut up, boy.


Q: Interesting. Now Kit, some of us have been wondering, how much did it cost to get fur pockets surgically added to your hips?

Kit: *rolls his eyes and grumbles* Next question, please.


Q: Okay... Have you ever told Baloo to stop calling you Lil' Britches because you have none?

Karnage: **laughs hysterically**

Kit: *blushes* That's it, I'm out of here. **stomps off**


Q: For Karnage: Have anything to say to your legions of loyal fan femmes?

Karnage: Yes, yes I do... QUIT STALKING ME!!!


Q: One final Q to the Big K: Were you thinking about how much you needed a successor before you found Kit? Or did the idea just hit you when you saw something of yourself in that cussing, fighting little streetrat?

**Kit comes back and grins at him, very interested in the answer**

Karnage: Ehm... **glances at Kit** I uh... **blushes, and fidgets with his collar** Well, that is... I... What are you all staring at?! This interview is over!

Got something you've always wanted to ask Kit or the Captain? Send it to the Iron Vulture, and see what they say!


So Ya Wanna Be A Pirate...

Hey guys! Kit Cloudkicker here. I know a lot of you wonder sometimes just what it takes to be a successful Pirate around here. Well, here're some of my own pointers.

When engaged in a singalong, DO NOT call for a repeat chorus before the Captain does.

DO keep away from this guy...

DO compliment the Captain on his snazzy dressing whenever possible. However, DO NOT comment on the fact that he wears the same outfit every day anyway...

DO share and share alike with your fellow Pirates... unless you've got something really good, in which case, the hell with 'em!

DO NOT practice swinging your cutlass near fellow Pirates with tails. Or whiskers. Maddog's still giving me dirty looks about that.

Also, if you have a dagger, DO NOT leave it on the Captain's chair and forget to pick it up before it's too late... I speak from personal experience and two days spent scraping barnacles off the Vulture's hull on this one...

And most importantly, if you want to be taken seriously as a Pirate, DO NOT dress like this...


K&K were recently asked to list the top ten reasons they think Baloo and Rebecca would make it as a couple...

10.

9.

8.

7.

6.

5.

4.

3.

2.

1.

I think we get the point.


DK: My puny protégé and myself have decided that your undeserving selves may have the first look at the following pictures.
 Kit: Yep. These pics are drawn by fellow klub members Adam Davis and Krickitt, and are all colored by The Brahma Bear, Ted!
 Drawn by Adam D. Drawn by Adam D.
Note: Clicking on the thumbnails will open up a new window.

That's all for now, folks. If you have any ideas for articles, top tens, questions, comments, etc, please send them in! K&K need you! (although they won't admit it :-)